question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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