More tranny stories later!
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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