I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
