Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
