She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
