Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
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