nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
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