im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
