I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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