When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Congratulations! We have a period
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