the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
We're too hungover to prance.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
