I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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