I just pynch a tree in the face
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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