dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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