What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize