I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
