We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
