you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
