I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
