I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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