you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
