even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize