i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
