I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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