God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
