somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
