have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
