Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
