On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
it glows. i had to have it.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
