I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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