Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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