Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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