Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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