you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
