I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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