you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
