and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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