YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
