honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
