the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
