so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize