i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
