On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
