Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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