tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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