When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
