Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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