now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
