I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
