bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
